Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Mourning - Broken

A rush hour train is no place for not one, but two full-sized strollers, but what are you gonna do? People have to get where they have to get.

Between stations, though, one of the children in the strollers begins to wail, a desperate, piercing cry that instantly fills me with rage, and this sudden, overwhelming reaction surprises me, so I try to sit with it, to see where it leads.

Under the rage is fear, right in the solar plexus beneath my ribcage - fear of all the things I have left ungrieved in my life, fear that it will come up and overwhelm me, swallow me, memories of how I used to cry as a child - and as I continue to let it speak, it turns from cold anger into sadness, a little mini echo of the child's sorrow, the two of us mourning all the pain in the world that goes unexpressed.
One year ago: Cyber
Two years ago: De-escalation
Three years ago: Something to Do
Four years ago: Seventh Inning Booty Moving
Eight years ago: 5/17/09 - I'm Everything You Ever Were Afraid Of
Nine years ago: 5-17-08 "Awesome!"

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